Monday, May 11, 2009

Say What?

I used to think writing was a good thing - you know, a way to express some creativity. But now I wonder. It has stirred up some sort of pot which was bubbling away in the background. Or I think it has. Maybe that pot would have stirred on its own with the passage of time.

I am 48, going on 49. For the last three years, or so, I have experienced middle age. Some would call it a crisis. I wouldn't go that far, for there is no real danger of anything beyond losing my mind. An argument can be made that that happened a long time ago (yes, self-deprecating sarcasm, sorry about that).

Despite there being no danger, there has been a hammering realization that aging is a reality. That the past is the past, separate from us, yet still attached. The future is no comfort because we now actually get a feeling of what it may be like with the degradation of certain bodily functions. The present is no friend as we use that time to consider both the future and the past. Middle age is a vortex, a desperate grab to hold on to what was and a furtive attempt to avoid heading down the dreaded hill.

I thought writing would benefit my attempts to record the past, to somehow rebreathe life back into it. I don't want to live in the past; just simply experience it again from time to time. Unfortunately, it's left me frustrated more than anything. It seems that I can't capture any of it in a manner which is realistic and fulfilling. I've tried with poetry. I've tried with fiction. I get glimpses of it now and then, but the sum totality of it all is missing.

I keep thinking that I just need the right combination of words to act as a key to unlock the chambers that hold the essence of what I seek. The search for the right combination has been fruitless, though, to a large extent. Additionally, there seems to be an attention deficit disorder lurking in the shadows that robs me of my will to keep searching. It's as if I sense a futility in the trying. It's also as if the task seems so daunting that I just can't see the point of attempting it.

Maybe there's a spot of laziness as well.

Now, I look back over what I have written here, and I see the ADD has taken over again. This has missed the mark of what I was attempting to do, and I have lost that thread already.

Just a part of getting older, I guess.

Friday, May 8, 2009

New Email Scam

Received this email today. It is obviously a phishing scam, but oh, so clever.

Hello.

My name is Dennis Platt I am the representative of Internet Fidelity Bureau. We were based in 2001 and have a seven year experience fighting against internet criminals. The main aim of our activity is to help victims of a scam. If you`ve become a victim of internet scam, let us know immediately and we will help you to get your money back. If you or your friend have got scammed of a home based job, were a money mule, cashed out fake checks, transferred the funds overseas, sent parcels and were cheated or just suspect your company a fraud - let us know urgently! We will make our best to get your money back and solveyour doubts about your strange employer. We cooperate with the biggest National Safety agencies, fraud departments of Western Union and MoneyGram and internet providers from US,Africa and Europe.

Contact me today.

Regards,
Dennis Platt, IFB Team..

Given how poorly this email was written (I've made some corrections), it smacks of scam. Still, it's a clever approach.

Watch yourselves out there.

Manny Happy Returns (in 50 games)

So Manny Ramirez has tested positive for a banned substance, and Major League Baseball has suspended him for 50 games.

He stated that the drug was presribed for a medical condition. Unofficial reports are saying that the drug was Human Chorionic Gonadotropin (HCG).

Wikipedia has this to say about HCG:

Human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) is a glycoprotein hormone produced in pregnancy that is made by the developing embryo soon after conception and later by the syncytiotrophoblast (part of the placenta). Its role is to prevent the disintegration of the corpus luteum of the ovary and thereby maintain progesterone production that is critical for a pregnancy in humans. hCG may have additional functions; for instance, it is thought that hCG affects the immune tolerance of the pregnancy.

Assuming Manny isn't pregnant, then why would he take HCG, a female hormone?

I knew someone many years ago who had to take HCG. His testacles didn't descend, and he had to receive HCG injections, I believe, to stimulate the production of testosterone.

And there lies a possible clue. Steroid users apparently take HCG after going through the steroid cycle to restimulate the production of testosterone which is apparently suppressed by steroid usage.

There are people who have stated that HCG can have a performance-enhancing affect as it does increase testosterone production. But I have to wonder if Ramirez took steroids some time in 2008, for his numbers shot into the stratosphere during the second half of the season after being sent to the Dodgers.

I don't know that there is much anecdotal evidence for steroid usage beyond that and the HCG. However, it wouldn't surprise me at all if Manny thought he could get away with using steroids in this day and age.

There seems to be a serious disconnect between common sense and Manny Ramirez.